Good point Jermaine Clement!
I’ve noticed this for years, and I am 100% certain that I am not alone in this observation.
In our culture it’s accepted for females of any combination (straight-straight, straight-gay, gay-gay) to compliment each other’s physical appearance, hold hands, cuddle, be physically affectionate in public, and express emotion. However, it is only okay for men in a gay-gay combination to do these exact same actions.
Obviously I’m a female, so I can’t speak for the various degrees of male bonding, only from my observations. And from what I’ve seen men are trapped in their manliness. Right down to the I’m-Not-Gay pat when they hug each other – meaning three quick pats on the back followed by immediate separation.
I think that a scene from one of my favorite TV shows, How I Met Your Mother, is the perfect way to round off this topic that I’ve written about so poorly (my apologizes – I only had three hours of sleep last night):
Marshall: [Referring to being a girl in a bar] Oh, poor me. I get to order yummy pink drinks with chunks of real fruit that guys secretly like but can’t order because they’ll be made fun of.
Marshall: They’re delicious!