Of One-Way Friendships

One Way Street

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There’s nothing quite like friendship. Right?

It brings people together: they laugh, they dance, they sing songs, they get deep (real deep), they get drunk, they go on adventures, they rant, they go on and on about their romantic lives (or lack there of), I could write this list for hours. I love friends, more specifically, I love my friends.

But … more than once, in fact, more than thrice I’ve ended up in one-way friendships.

These are tiring, and usually occur once a human being reaches a point of expecting – meaning that they just assume that I’ll organize things. Or a point of taking me for granted – meaning that they know I’ll always be there. In both cases, I’m the one who has to make all the phone calls, organize plans, re-organize plans when suddenly they can’t make it. I get a lot of silence on their end and, “Oh my God I’m so sorry.”

Like my time isn’t as valuable as their’s, as if I don’t have homework, a job, a family, or other people I’m trying to balance. Apparently I have all the time in the world to sit around and wait for their convenience. Here’s the point of this rant: make time for your friends people, especially if plans you made plans in advance.

I wish it was as easy as toss them to the side, who needs that kind of friendship? Truth is I’m bad at ending friendships, I want to keep my friends – as I said earlier, I love them. Who likes to break up with somebody or enjoys confronting them about unfair behavior? No one.

I’ve been forced to walk away from a few best friends. It sucks, and there’s always a lingering bitterness. It’s worse than breaking up with a partner – because friendship isn’t as simple as we single or taken. Friendship cuts deeper, makes for allowances, and hopes that the other person will come around. Ending a friendship feels like a betrayal.

At the same time, if a person is putting zero effort into your friendship, they’ve created a problem that is nearly impossible to remedy. So to the people who live a life with one-way friendships it’s time to adhere to the age-old question: should I stay or should I go? (and yes, please start singing now).


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