I’ve been going out dancing since I was eighteen. At first I was awkward (as many are), unsure of how to move my body to music (had no personal style), and didn’t feel confident dancing alone (finding a grinding buddy was a must).
Quickly I learned how to shimmy my ass off and move around the floor. My greatest discovery being that I don’t have much of a butt, thus trying to shake it like the other girls made me look plain weird. Isolating the torso to this day is my strength. Through the basic motion of moving my ribs from side to side I am able to create the illusion of having hips like Shakira. People say I appear sexy and creative when I dance, in reality I’m doing six moves on repeat.
Thanks to my five-year background maneuvering around the club scene, I am highly practiced at starting the party. With the exception of my dancing buddies, most my friends have only ever heard me go on and on about my extreme dance obsession: Blues, swing, Scottish Country, square, clubbing, etc. It’s a wonder they even put up with my jabber. So when we I went out with my non-dance friends for a farewell bash, they were all shocked and amazed by how quickly I can fill a dance floor (two different clubs, both nearly empty, it was crowded within five minutes – not that I’m bragging…).
And right now, I’m gonna tell you the secret.
The key to starting the party is patience. I don’t just mean waiting for people to start moving. I mean waiting for the right song. A song that is popular and everybody seems to love, aka something from the Top 40’s list. Also, 90s hits are always safe choice, especially if the song is hip hop, I cannot stress that enough. Clubrats love 90s night.
Next is confidence. Whether you are a good dancer or not, you have to own it. If you’re shy you probably don’t believe me, but there is something equally attractive about someone who throws themselves into their moves (even if they are far from stellar) as the person who is wickedly talented in the dance department. The reason is because of confidence, people don’t care if you are good, they care if you look like fun to hang out with.
The last part takes practice – come across as appealing. Balance being sexy with dorky. Seductive with quirky. Vixen with wacky. You want people to feel gravitated towards you and yet comfortable to dance near you. If you’re too good, too sexy, then people will tend to shy away in fear of your talent – except for a few creepers that may try to hit on you. Mixing the playful side of your personality might mean busting out the sprinkler or pulling a friend who is an average dancer onto the floor with you. My go to is hopping. Yup, hopping. In between torso twirls I’ll bop about on my toes with my arms above my head.
If all else fails do the macarena – I’m serious, you can do the macarena to any pop/hip-hop song ever made. Just wait for the bridge or chorus with an 8-count beat.
Let’s recap: remember patience, remain confident (they can sense fear), and balance your sexy self with your playfulness.
Oh, I almost forgot, it also helps to use the space around you. Try not to stand in one spot the whole time.
End of lesson. You are now educated with the basic rules for adequately starting the party. After a little practice you won’t even realize you’re doing these things, until that fateful day when a less skilled friend points out your talent.