Of 25 Years of Knowledge!

Lighting the Candle

Lighting the Candle

Today is my 25th birthday, which means I’m due for a quarter-life-crisis anytime now.  Most importantly, I can officially rent a car anywhere in the United States without being forced to pay extra extensive fees. My last God-given American right till I can get Senior Discount.

Over the last 25 years I have come to acquire much knowledge, 25 of those nuggets of wisdom are listed below.

Mime smoking the candle

Mime smoking the candle

Enjoy:

  • Always get paid to go to the bathroom when at work. It’s strangely satisfying. Don’t go on your break.
  • Being rejected sucks, but it’s better than pining.
  • There’s no such thing as Sunday’s best. You can wear nice clothes whenever the Hell you want.
  • God doesn’t hate people. God loves people. So whoever, or whatever your God, or lack of God is – just be happy.
  • In terms of coming out, there is no “right” place to be, go at your own pace.
  • Whales are the best creatures, but they shouldn’t be held in giant salty bathtubs.
  •  You’re never too old for children’s movies.
  • Dance is the best thing ever.
  • “It is perfectly acceptable to watch TV all day,” Nick Miller (New Girl).  I concur, so long as it’s not EVERYDAY.
This is kinda burning my face.

This is kinda burning my face.

  • Don’t be a hipster. Just…. don’t. It’s not cool to complain that other people are only just now discovering something awesome – it’s douchey.
  • Do what you have to do, don’t let pride get in the way of moving forward. Like, if you need a job but can’t find anything other than fast food – take it and keep looking for something better.
  • Don’t waste time on one-way friendships (aka, when you do all of the work and they constantly bail or cancel on you). In the end, it’s never worth it.
  • There’s no need for closet fandom. Don’t be ashamed of your tastes.
  • Go on mini adventures.
  • It’s super lame when people have to get drunk in order to have the balls to do something.
  • A pent-up kiss is a dangerous catalyst.
  • When hiking make sure to venture off the standard path. See what happens when you make your way through the brush, maybe you’ll find a hidden paradise.
  • Cliff jumping is terrifying but exciting.
Wax burned my hand

Wax burned my hand

  • Long distance friendships are difficult to maintain but they make for lasting friendships – texting and Facebook help. As an added bonus of your long-distance BFF, you’ll always have someone to gossip with, since most likely they will never actually meet any of the people you talk about. Or if they ever do visit, they’ll already know so much about your buddies that they’ll act like old friends. It’s a win-win.
  • You can make any summer dress into a winter dress by adding leggings, a jacket, and boots. Fact.
  • Truly hating someone or holding a grudge is a wasted emotion. Channel that angst somewhere more productive and less bitchy.
  • If you need help, ask for it.
  • People have way more sex on TV than any single person I have ever known in real life.
  • No matter how embarrassing, awful, or weird the event was – at least now you got a great story.
  • Embrace whatever phase of life you’re in. Before you know it, everything will change again, and all you’ll have left of right now is some memories – and maybe a trinket or two.
Bye bye candle

Bye bye candle

*Sorry, I was forced to use bullet points because it wouldn’t let me insert the pictures without restarting the numbers from zero. But I swear there’s 25 things – count if ya don’t trust me 🙂

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