Of Tuesday Tunes – Hypnotic by Vanic X Zella Day

My song of the week is Hypnotic by Vanic X Zella Day.

The opening of this song is seductive. Normally when I think of snaps my mind goes straight to West Side Story or poetry and bongos, but these snaps, these are some sexy snaps. The song weaves a sultry chillstep background with uptempo electronic music perfectly. Coupled with the beautiful and slightly sassy vocal styling, it makes for a very satisfying music experience.

In terms of placement in a fusion set, this is the sort of song I look for to transition out of pretty ballad land into upbeat boogie time.

Favorite lyric: “Talking like a headstrong Mama.”

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Of Tunesday Tunes – Nothing Would be Better by Nick Jonas

My song of the week is Nothing Would be Better by Nick Jonas.

Nick Jonas’ solo debut is fantastic! If you’re hesitant because of his Disney/boy band background, just remember that the now beloved Justin Timberlake has a similar history #JimmyFallonsBFF #Hilarious #WhoKnew? #SexyBack #CryMeaRiver #Classic

Honestly, it was difficult choosing only one song off this album. I can’t recommend fiercely enough that you listen to the whole thing, if you have a soul you won’t be disappointed. Almost every song falls into one of my two favorite categories: fun or sexy.

Few songs make me hit the repeat button as often as Nothing Would be Better has. The song is beautiful with a rich build to a mostly instrumental chorus – he uses the wordless chorus quite a lot actually. The words are poetic yet simple as Nick’s voice balances perfectly with the stunning orchestration in the background.

Plus as an added bonus for danceland, it’s the perfect song to DJ in the middle of a blues/fusion set.

Favorite lyric: “We don’t turn around unless we’re throwing stones. And we’re crawling like there’s cracks all in our bones. You’re the broken part of me that makes me whole. But so unsure”

Of Tuesday Tunes – Can’t Save Her by Chantal Claret

My song of the week is Can’t Save Her by Chantal Claret.

This song oozes sex, with her seductive voice soaring over a simple but captivating background.

As a dancer/DJ, finding a song that has a solid kick (when the song goes up – usually through the addition of new instruments or a change of key) is magic. What makes the kick in Can’t Save Her perfect is the brief moment wear they strip down the song to minimal instruments and vocals. Then once the anticipation is too much they build up the song and grab your attention in a different and exciting way – kinda like sex.

Favorite lyric: “Another noch on her bed, she forgets the time she said that when sex becomes a habit it’s no fun.”

Of Awkward Slow Dances

When I was a freshmen in high school I understood only one thing about sex, a penis and vagina in close proximity leads to a baby. Now, how the baby formed I had no idea. I never took sex ed, I wasn’t a curious child, and I never had the sex talk with my parents. Still haven’t. I wouldn’t figure out how sex worked until my sophomore year when my health teacher demonstrated how to use a tampon on a clear plastic vagina. At which point I had a light bulb kind of moment.

So when I had my first date to Homecoming I was mortified. Truthfully I didn’t want to go with him, but I felt pressured by my friends and at the time I was too nice to say no. I cried for an hour when I got home as my teenage world began to crumble as I panicked about going on a date with a boy. I mean, the last time my family thought I liked someone my brothers wouldn’t let it go. I was preparing myself for crushing embarrassment.

Still when the time came I got ready for the dance. Sadly, I lost the only picture I had but I’ll paint a picture. I was wearing a purple polka dot dress that my mom made with my hair braided across my head like a headband. And he was in a baggy suit that did not have a corsage because I didn’t know that those existed. Making him the only boy at the dance not wearing a flower.

Basically we stood like this:

A re-enactment

Don’t we look cozy?

On the way to the dance we sat far apart from each other in the backseat of his mom’s car, who was blaring Big & Rich. And for dinner he took me to Denny’s. Yes Denny’s, where I’m sure I had some sort of breakfast food.

I don’t remember much about the dance, except for the slow dances. Now as I mentioned earlier I had no knowledge of how making babies worked. So in order to protect my innocence I danced like this:

A reenactment #2

Because I was convinced that if this:

A reenactment #3

Got too close to this:

A reenactment #4

Then he would become aroused, I’d no longer be a virgin, and possibly get pregnant. So for every slow song I danced with my butt sticking way too far out – it was definitely a learning experience.

Needless to say, we never dated.

Of Tuesday Tunes – Uptown Funk by Mark Ronson Featuring Bruno Mars

Before my work schedule cut into my social life I used to DJ for the blues/fusion social dance scene on a regular basis. And I’m not gonna lie, I was pretty awesome. So while I not-so-patiently await my return to dance land, I figured I’d begin sharing my musical wisdom with a song of the week.

This week I’m obsessed with Mark Ronson’s Uptown Funk featuring Bruno Mars. It’s so catchy I can hardly stand it – I want to listen to it all the time. Think The Blues Brothers meets early Michael Jackson with a modern twist.

In short, it makes me want to dance in the most energetic theatrical way possible.

Favorite lyric: “Gotta kiss myself I’m so pretty.”

Of 25 Years of Knowledge!

Lighting the Candle

Lighting the Candle

Today is my 25th birthday, which means I’m due for a quarter-life-crisis anytime now.  Most importantly, I can officially rent a car anywhere in the United States without being forced to pay extra extensive fees. My last God-given American right till I can get Senior Discount.

Over the last 25 years I have come to acquire much knowledge, 25 of those nuggets of wisdom are listed below.

Mime smoking the candle

Mime smoking the candle

Enjoy:

  • Always get paid to go to the bathroom when at work. It’s strangely satisfying. Don’t go on your break.
  • Being rejected sucks, but it’s better than pining.
  • There’s no such thing as Sunday’s best. You can wear nice clothes whenever the Hell you want.
  • God doesn’t hate people. God loves people. So whoever, or whatever your God, or lack of God is – just be happy.
  • In terms of coming out, there is no “right” place to be, go at your own pace.
  • Whales are the best creatures, but they shouldn’t be held in giant salty bathtubs.
  •  You’re never too old for children’s movies.
  • Dance is the best thing ever.
  • “It is perfectly acceptable to watch TV all day,” Nick Miller (New Girl).  I concur, so long as it’s not EVERYDAY.
This is kinda burning my face.

This is kinda burning my face.

  • Don’t be a hipster. Just…. don’t. It’s not cool to complain that other people are only just now discovering something awesome – it’s douchey.
  • Do what you have to do, don’t let pride get in the way of moving forward. Like, if you need a job but can’t find anything other than fast food – take it and keep looking for something better.
  • Don’t waste time on one-way friendships (aka, when you do all of the work and they constantly bail or cancel on you). In the end, it’s never worth it.
  • There’s no need for closet fandom. Don’t be ashamed of your tastes.
  • Go on mini adventures.
  • It’s super lame when people have to get drunk in order to have the balls to do something.
  • A pent-up kiss is a dangerous catalyst.
  • When hiking make sure to venture off the standard path. See what happens when you make your way through the brush, maybe you’ll find a hidden paradise.
  • Cliff jumping is terrifying but exciting.
Wax burned my hand

Wax burned my hand

  • Long distance friendships are difficult to maintain but they make for lasting friendships – texting and Facebook help. As an added bonus of your long-distance BFF, you’ll always have someone to gossip with, since most likely they will never actually meet any of the people you talk about. Or if they ever do visit, they’ll already know so much about your buddies that they’ll act like old friends. It’s a win-win.
  • You can make any summer dress into a winter dress by adding leggings, a jacket, and boots. Fact.
  • Truly hating someone or holding a grudge is a wasted emotion. Channel that angst somewhere more productive and less bitchy.
  • If you need help, ask for it.
  • People have way more sex on TV than any single person I have ever known in real life.
  • No matter how embarrassing, awful, or weird the event was – at least now you got a great story.
  • Embrace whatever phase of life you’re in. Before you know it, everything will change again, and all you’ll have left of right now is some memories – and maybe a trinket or two.
Bye bye candle

Bye bye candle

*Sorry, I was forced to use bullet points because it wouldn’t let me insert the pictures without restarting the numbers from zero. But I swear there’s 25 things – count if ya don’t trust me 🙂

Of Saving Money

 

Tomorrow Land Jar

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If there’s one thing I’m truly terrible at in this world, other than sports and yoga, its saving money. I’ve never been good at letting my funds build before I go on a shopping spree. Or even giving myself enough of a cushion so that I’m not living paycheck to paycheck. Hell, with two jobs I’m still broke.

Granted I do have some legitimate things to pay for, such as school loans, car loan, insurance, and gas.  But any extra money tends to go towards coffee, dresses, beer, and dance cover fees.

Typically, I’ll come across three types of people:

  1. Those that are like me. Who are constantly going out, doing things that require money, shopping, and paying for others – they are also borderline broke.
  2. Or there are those who seem to have a magical bank account that never runs dry. With these folks, they might be living off their student loans. Or maybe working a part-time job with nothing to significant pay for.
  3. Or they are home bodies who don’t spend much money.

And while I can respect the financially savvy individual who is saving up each and every dollar. I’d rather live my life on the brink of brokeness. If I absolutely had to cut something out or my account would be overdrawn, I’d probably choose the beer and shopping. But I’m not about to give up coffee or dancing – not if I can squeeze out a few more pennies and afford to do what I love.

Broke Meme

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Of Balance and Creativity

Ballerina Hanging on a Fence

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Hey people! My apologies for the hiatus this past month. I know that the second rule of blogging is to never apologize for not writing (the first obviously being never post your diary online). But screw it, I’m going to apologize anyways. It’s too late, and no one can stop me.

In defense of my laziness, I have three very good excuses:

  1. I work two jobs 

    Yes! I’m a big girl now, with a big girl job, and the pencil skirts to go along with it. But alas, I still have the movie theater job on the weekend. The last day off I had was Christmas Day. It’s a marvel that I manage to see any of my friends, let alone sleep.

  2. It was the holidays 

    Lame excuse, I know, but regardless I’m using it. The excitement of the holidays threw my world into a frenzy. It was wonderful, I saw lovely people, and received great gifts (sans the book of psalms that I’m trying to not be bitter about).

  3. I’m trapped at my parents house until July

    Twenty-three years old, college graduate, work two jobs, DJ when I can, and yet I’m back in my high school bedroom surrounded by all the articles of Sarah’s past. That is until my future roommates lease runs out and I’m able to move.

Living in my old room zaps away my creativity. Normally I live in a world of narration, plot planning, and characterizing every person I see. But something about my parents house turns my mind to mush, my plots to pointless, and my characters to unbelievable. It’s unfortunate, but alas, true.

____________

Though, now that I’ve started typing, I feel like me again.

So I guess I’ll do some belated new year’s resolutions:

  • Post here at least five times a month (min).
  • Start my nightmare novel.
  • Write a literal account of The 12 Days of Christmas before the arrival of the 2013 holidays
  • Get better at footwork when dancing.
  • Buy a new laptop and practice DJing for club music.
  • Get a Nexus pass

Of Spotting the Drunk Banana

Banana Costume

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I can’t say I love Halloween. I never have, even as a child I thought it was immensely overrated: trick or treating took way too long, the candy was disappointing, and it was intensely cold. I’d rather stay home.

As I got older I really wanted to like Halloween, I did. I threw a party in high school. I wore a slutty costume my sophomore year of college and went clubbing. I drove all the way to Seattle to party on Capital Hill. For all these adventures I was moderately amused, but I’ve never felt the excitement that people around me seemed to indulge in. Course, I’m usually 95% sober – that might be part of the problem.

But every year as I hang around my buddies, and watch them drink in their Halloween bliss, I keep up my search for the Drunk Banana.

Almost every Halloween I stumble across a Drunk Banana. A belligerent male stumbling around the streets, tripping over his tongue, with the tip of the banana suit beginning to sag. That Banana is one shot away from passing out behind a dumpster and snuggling against a mound of trash. Regardless of his, not-so-classy, demeanor he’s entertaining. I hail Satan for bringing me the Drunk Banana and all the people watching joy that he provides.

This year I missed the Drunk Banana. He slipped passed my vision as I ditched the mainstream Halloween realm of cocktails and techno music to embark on the underground Blues Dancing scene that owns my soul. I made the better choice, trust me, for once Halloween didn’t completely suck.

But I missed my version of the Great Pumpkin. Maybe next year.

Of Creepy Vs. Cute

Creepy girl

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Everyone has the potential for coming across as an all-star creeper. Trust me, I have the skills to creep your pants off if I desire – take that literally or figuratively, I don’t care. At the same time, all humans can come across absolutely adorable, cuteness oozing through all pores. So the next time you think, ugh s/he is so creepy, just remember that someone somewhere in the world thinks the exact same thing about you.

The real question is what makes a person or interaction creepy? To put it simply, I think it comes down to understanding a rapport. Are we friends? Are they attractive? Have I met them? Do I like them (romantic or platonic)? These are the questions that determine if the behavior is cute, creepy, or creepy-esque (an awkward, but awesome, friendship).

For any of you that are easily confused by social situations, if the answer to the question, have I met them? is no. Then don’t make a move other than to get to know them – for you will come across creepy unless you’re celebrity-level-attractive.

If the answer to all four questions is a heartfelt YES!!! Then any attempts at being creepy will fail. In order to succeed in making the other human uncomfortable you’ll have to put forth a lot of effort and catch your romantic interest off guard. Best to accept your fate and just be the delectable little dumpling that you are, for everything you do will have your partner thinking, awww. So relax, watch some gag worthy romantic comedies, snuggle whilst drinking tea, and proceed to melt into an adorable pile of goo.

In all other circumstances there’s a boundary. Defining the line of cute vs. creepy will require you to pay attention to your surroundings. The same behavior can trigger very different reactions if you’re lost in your head. I’ll give you an example:

I was saying goodbye to a girl I was kind of/sorta/almost seeing for a while and she put her hands in the pockets of my trench coat when we stood outside my car. We were standing in a middle-school slow dance pose chatting, when I paused for a moment, looked down, and said, “Hey, I sent a man away for putting his hand in my pocket.” To which she replied, “Yeah, but you like me.” We proceed to kiss goodbye and I drove away. It was all very simple and sweet, damn cute I’d say.

The man that I mentioned to her, trespassed into creepy territory. I was at a nightclub and I gave the bastard a chance by letting him dance with me. And to my surprise he was decent (for a club dancer) and he even bought me a drink.

I’d never had someone buy me a drink before, and I haven’t since. He continued hanging around me, which was fine, after all, I did let him dance with me and buy me alcohol. But then he put his hand in the pocket of my dress. Excuse me! Those are my pockets. Mine! Put your arm around my shoulder or waist, fine, but don’t put your hand in my pocket, mediocre looking man I’ve just met. I lifted his hand up and said, “You can’t just put your hand in my pocket.” And he said, “But I bought you a drink.” And I said “Yeah, and thank you. But you still can’t put your hand in my pocket.” Then he huffed and puffed away and eventually was groping on a super skanky chick. Creepy.

Ultimately the behavior was the same – hands in pockets – the difference was the rapport.

The final type of behavior in these situations is creepy-esque. Basically it’s taking what would be seen as creepy and blowing it up to satirical proportions. Be warned, not everyone has the personality or skill to pull this off. It really is a talent you’re born with, and can only be practiced on people who actually like you as a human being. Otherwise – you’ll have no friends.

I have some friendships that are founded on my being creepy-esque and them playing the straight card. I’ll hug them, whisper sweet nothings in their ear, and they’ll stand there like I just put a gun to their head. Everyone laughs, and we go on our merry ways. Other friends will dish the creepy-esque right back – quickly those friendships turn into a competitive, top that bitch, type of bond. And there are some people who I wouldn’t be anything but cute and socially polite for, why?, because I understand our rapport and they couldn’t handle the creepy side of my persona.

Are you/they being cute or creepy is a question that can easily be asked daily, both in romantic and platonic situations. It’s amazing to me how many people don’t understand the nature (and beauty for that matter) of various forms of friendships and bonds.

So are you cute or creepy? The answers gotta be, “Yes.”